“Only from such a place of loss and longing can we begin remembering ourselves home.”                                 ~Toko-pa Turner, Belonging: Remembering Ourselves Back Home, p. 18 After two weeks of Arizona sunshine, loving friends, gourmet meals, and brilliant stars, I looked forward to […]

Don’t worry when the logger leaves after one day. Be glad he cares about the forest. Be glad he’s upset when his equipment makes ruts in the unfrozen earth beneath the snow. Let the Finger Lakes Land Trust conservation forester and this careful logger and neighbor who cuts only sick or broken trees handle this. […]

My mother-in-law Virginia was present during every conversation the last few weeks. She was alert when the public health nurse evaluated her condition and approved the application for skilled nursing care. She watched her health aide and me write her name on her clothing with permanent markers and place a neat stack of shirts and […]

Dear Vic, I can’t take care of your mother anymore. I can’t keep giving her the precious energy I need for my own life. I have to face that she’s almost out of money to pay for 24 hour health aides. I hoped she could die in her own home when she became a hospice […]

During an exhausting week of moving my husband Vic’s 102-year-old mother to a nursing home, I searched through an old file cabinet looking for a paper needed to fill out her insurance forms. I hadn’t visited those files since Vic’s death in 2008. After finding what I needed, I wondered what else was in there. […]

We drove along the west side of Cayuga Lake toward Seneca Falls, NY, the site of the Women’s Rights National Historical Park where the first Women’s Rights Convention met in 1848. One year ago, Jane and Roger and I drove to Washington, DC for the national march. This year, we stayed closer to home. After […]