Grief is a sacred journey

Family and Friends

Flowers for the Living, Flowers for the Dead

  “Go ahead. Arrange and rearrange the stones on top of your beloved’s grave. Keep arranging those stones for as long as it hurts to do it, then stop just before you really want to. Put the […]

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Loneliness and Solitude in Grief: A guest blog by Marty Tousley

I recently discovered an outstanding website and blog titled Grief Healing by Marty Tousley, CNS-BC, FT, DCC. Marty has been a bereavement counselor at Phoenix, AZ’s Hospice of the Valley since 1996 and launched her website in […]

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Why We Need Hospice Help with Bereavement and End of Life Issues

In late October 1959, the illness began as a simple cold and quickly moved to kidney failure. Since Dad was sick for twelve of my fourteen years, I was used to this. His doctors often predicted the […]

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The Crone of Cayuga Lake: Continuing Bonds with a Wild Teacher

In September 1968, Vic and I rented a barely winterized cottage on Cayuga Lake. The next spring, we splurged on a canoe. As we explored the lake, Vic paddled and steered from the stern, while I practiced […]

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The Dalai Lama’s Templeton Prize

In March 2012, a friend sent a link to a Huffington Post article: Dalai Lama Wins Templeton Prize For Work On Science, Religion. I flashed back to forgotten details of the weeks before my husband Vic’s death […]

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Speeding to Strong Cancer Center

In 2007, a month after Vic’s stem cell transplant, he drives our Subaru west on the New York State Thruway. I’m in the passenger seat, watching his jaw muscle pop. “Let’s make a list,” I suggest. “I […]

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Creating a Grief Ritual: Love, Loss, and Continuing Bonds

Sunday, June 3 was the fourth anniversary of my husband’s death. I put aside time that day to mourn for Vic and our lost future while honoring the gifts of our marriage and my emerging life. My […]

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From Medicine to Mercy

  In 1998, a staff member at the senile dementia home in Rochester found Mom passed out on the bathroom floor, bleeding internally, moving gently toward death. Mom’s husband Herlie wasn’t ready to let go, so he […]

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Goodbye, My Miss Daisy

She looks up at me with sorrowful shame-filled eyes. I’m sorry, her eyes say. I’m sorry. I’m sorry. “Oh Daisy-Girl, it’s OK,” I croon. Her eyes squint with worry. She has squirmed herself off her towel-covered bed, […]

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Continuing Bonds

The year following my husband Vic’s death, his absence stunned me as I walked by his orderly shelves of books or smelled the acrid scent of firewood he had cut.  I woke up and went to sleep […]

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