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Loneliness and Solitude in Grief: A guest blog by Marty Tousley

On July 24, 2012 / Bereavement and End of Life, Family and Friends / 12 Comments

I recently discovered an outstanding website and blog titled Grief Healing by Marty Tousley, CNS-BC, FT, DCC. Marty has been a bereavement counselor at Phoenix, AZ’s Hospice of the Valley since 1996 and launched her website in

Civil Disobedience against the Vietnam War at Peace Bridge, Buffalo, NY: 1967

On July 17, 2012 / My Land and Home, Political Action, Spirituality / 4 Comments

I lean into Vic, tucking my shoulder under his arm. Feeling me tremble, he unzips his jacket and wraps it around both of us. I’d rather be in bed, pressed against his naked body, but instead I’m

Angry Faces, Placid Water: Fracking, LPG Gas Storage and Seneca Lake

On July 10, 2012 / My Land and Home, Nature, Political Action / 12 Comments

It’s 9:30 pm when I hear from the speaker at the podium that the Inergy representative left the building before the public hearing ended. David Bimber, the regional head of the New York Department of Environmental Conservation

Why We Need Hospice Help with Bereavement and End of Life Issues

On July 3, 2012 / Bereavement and End of Life, Family and Friends / 4 Comments

In late October 1959, the illness began as a simple cold and quickly moved to kidney failure. Since Dad was sick for twelve of my fourteen years, I was used to this. His doctors often predicted the

The Crone of Cayuga Lake: Continuing Bonds with a Wild Teacher

On June 26, 2012 / Family and Friends, Health, My Land and Home, Nature / 6 Comments

In September 1968, Vic and I rented a barely winterized cottage on Cayuga Lake. The next spring, we splurged on a canoe. As we explored the lake, Vic paddled and steered from the stern, while I practiced

The Dalai Lama’s Templeton Prize

On June 19, 2012 / Bereavement and End of Life, Family and Friends, Spirituality / 8 Comments

In March 2012, a friend sent a link to a Huffington Post article: Dalai Lama Wins Templeton Prize For Work On Science, Religion. I flashed back to forgotten details of the weeks around my husband Vic’s death

Speeding to Strong Cancer Center

On June 12, 2012 / Bereavement and End of Life, Family and Friends, Health / 10 Comments

In 2007, a month after Vic’s stem cell transplant, he drives our Subaru west on the New York State Thruway. I’m in the passenger seat, watching his jaw muscle pop. “Let’s make a list,” I suggest. “I

Creating a Grief Ritual: Love, Loss, and Continuing Bonds

On June 5, 2012 / Bereavement and End of Life, My Land and Home, Spirituality / 12 Comments

June 3, 2012 was the fourth anniversary of my husband’s death. I put aside time that day to mourn for Vic and our lost future while honoring the gifts of our marriage and my emerging life. My

From Medicine to Mercy

On May 29, 2012 / Bereavement and End of Life, Family and Friends / 8 Comments

In 1998, a staff member at the senile dementia home in Rochester found Mom passed out on the bathroom floor, bleeding internally, moving gently toward death. Mom’s husband Herlie wasn’t ready to let go, so he rescinded

Goodbye, My Miss Daisy

On May 22, 2012 / Bereavement and End of Life, Family and Friends, My Land and Home / 10 Comments

She looks up at me with sorrowful shame-filled eyes. I’m sorry, her eyes say. I’m sorry. I’m sorry. “Oh Daisy-Girl, it’s OK,” I croon. Her eyes squint with worry. She has squirmed herself off her towel-covered