Grief is a sacred journey


A Gift of Love Delivered Long after His Death

Vic's Italian hands, 1991

My TEDx talk has over 50,000 viewers. The numbers keep growing. I’m glad it continues to help people who grieve. My husband Vic and I met fifty years ago this week. My love keeps growing, too. In […]

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Is There a Time Limit on Love?

Vic and Elaine

A woman told me people seem uncomfortable when she mentions her dead husband. “My husband would have loved this” or “his love still supports me.” Why does his presence in her thoughts disturb her friends? Why is it odd […]

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How is a Buddhist Monk like a Butterfly?


I don’t grasp the subtleties of Buddhist philosophic teachings or understand the mechanics of flight, but I know the beauty of a Korean monk opening his heart and a Fritillary opening her golden wings. I touch inner stillness as a Monarch sips nectar and the […]

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Regret: It’s Too Late Now, or Is It?

Elaine, Jim, Virginia 2014

I sobbed myself to sleep the night after my brother Jim’s memorial service. The huge gathering went smoothly, including my reading, but something gnawed inside. In the middle of the night, I woke up with a knot in […]

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When the Dalai Lama Blessed the Children

Meeting the Dalai Lama at the Ithaca Airport, 1979

When the Dalai Lama visited the United States for the first time in October 1979, he spent four days at Wisdom’s Goldenrod, a philosophy and meditation center near Seneca Lake in New York. Sidney Piburn, a friend and […]

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The Thief: When Cancer Returned

Jim and Elaine 2014

“I’m calling from Dana Farber,” a hushed male voice said on the phone. Oh no. It’s my brother. “Why are you at Dana Farber?” I asked in a quiet measured tone. Dana Farber Cancer Institute was where he […]

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After Dallas: Facing My Shadow

image by Credo

“These aren’t marijuana plants,” the policeman said to his partner.  He bent down to inspect a second tray of tomato seedlings I was growing outside and frowned. “These aren’t marijuana plants either.” He slowly shook his head with disappointment. They searched the outside of our […]

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Demeter and Drought: When the World Turns Dry

Persephone, Triptolemos, & Demeter, Eleusis, 430-440 BCE, wikipedia

The earth moans. Do you hear it? Plants wither. Birds neglect their morning songs. I miss the scent of warm rain. Yesterday’s clouds held promises. Storms blew through with scattered thunder and a whisper of a rainbow. There wasn’t […]

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The Queen Bee and the Honey Crone


“In Minoan Crete, the Goddess and her Priestesses, dressed as bees, are shown dancing together on a golden seal found buried with the dead.  …the bee signified the life that comes from death…. “Bee Goddess,” Temple of […]

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Honeybees and Humans: Our Sweet Interdependence


“I don’t see honeybees in the Shirley Poppies this year,” I said to my son David last summer. “Bees usually love them.” “Now that you mention it, I don’t have honeybees in my garden either,” he said. “I see […]

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