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The Color of Forgiveness

On May 14, 2019 / Bereavement and End of Life, Family and Friends / 34 Comments

154 “Will you meditate with me?” he asks. I’d said yes for many years. Chemotherapy was ordered hours ago. Salvage chemo. A cursed name That hasn’t yet arrived. I have nothing left to give. At 3 AM

Make Gardening Heal Again

On April 30, 2019 / Family and Friends, My Land and Home / 30 Comments

241 “I won’t plant vegetables this year,” I told my two sons this winter. I said it often to convince myself. I’ve grown vegetables since 1970, but the weeds were more persistent than I was last year.

Brothers, Sons, and a Missing Dad

On April 16, 2019 / Bereavement and End of Life, Family and Friends / 24 Comments

198 In 1974, David greeted his newborn brother with joy and a dripping nose. I decided their first meeting was more important than the risk of a snot-filled infant. My husband Vic took photos as I put

Sorting Seeds: Psyche’s First Labor Gives Us Lessons for Life

On April 2, 2019 / Health, Psychology and Mythology / 19 Comments

199 “Is this easier or harder?” my audiologist asks. “Raise your hand when you hear a beep. Do you prefer program 1 or program 4? You made great progress in a week, so keep going.” It feels

Relighting The Vital Fire

On March 19, 2019 / Health, Psychology and Mythology / 35 Comments

136 The day before cochlear implant surgery, I lifted weights and took a long brisk walk. Five weeks later, I feel a flickering flame of vitality, fragile and easily snuffed out by stress or restless sleep. Arctic

Persistent Memories and Psychological Descent

On March 5, 2019 / Psychology and Mythology / 29 Comments

113 Anxious memories broke into consciousness when I was almost three. They stuck like glue. The article “Memories of Trauma Are Unique because of How Brains and Bodies Respond to Threat” by Jack Debieck explains how the

The Wisdom of Descent in a World Addicted to Ascent

On February 19, 2019 / Psychology and Mythology / 32 Comments

429 We imagine heroes as willful and disciplined. The hero wins with a smart positive attitude. We accept the top part of this diagram, the “known” part, where we’re consciously working a problem and following our plan.

A Healing Ritual in a Sweetgrass Bowl: Self-Care for Surgery

On February 5, 2019 / Family and Friends, Health / 48 Comments

My support system is in place, but no one can protect me from vulnerability. When you read this, cochlear implant surgery will be over and I’ll be home recovering. As I write a few days before surgery,

How Grief Connected a British Metal Band and a Gray-Haired American Writer

On January 22, 2019 / Bereavement and End of Life, Creativity / 21 Comments

186 Last winter, I received an email from Mike Goncalves. Mike wrote that he manages a British band called “Our Hollow, Our Home.” Their songwriter and vocalist Tobias Young had been moved by my TEDx talk

Feeling the Sound: Listening with the Whole Body

On January 8, 2019 / Creativity, Health / 20 Comments

139 I heard Evelyn Glennie’s TED talk “How to Truly Listen” when I did a google search for deafness. In 2013, five years after my husband’s death, my already impaired hearing took a nose dive. A new