Grief is a sacred journey

Family and Friends

Learning to Forgive

Where is my Victor?” my mother-in-law asks. “He died, Virginia,” I tell her quietly. Her face scrunches into a grimace. She throws her head back to the right as if to shake something off.  An insect? A […]

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Please Leave Love Notes When You Die

A small group sat around a table in the Watkins Glen Public Library. They’d come to hear me read from Leaning into Love. I told stories and read for forty minutes and then turned it over to anyone who […]

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The Comfort of Small Things

Chickadees throw back their heads to praise the dawn. Bring us morning. Bring the light. They bring me faith in exchange for seeds. Mexican music blasts over the driving range loudspeakers. A tiny brown and white pup nibbles my pudgy five-year-old fingers. Hello, new […]

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An Unexpected Gift

He was lucky to get a teaching job when few were available in 1973. I was lucky to have his financial and emotional support. We were both lucky because we were in love. I was also pissed […]

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When Dreams Tell Our Future

“I had a dream last night,” Vic said in a thin raspy voice. “Really?” I said. Although he’d experienced a lifetime of vibrant dreams, he’d had few during recent months fueled by prednisone, codeine, and Ambien. “Yeah. I dreamed the […]

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My Grandma’s Juicy Secret

After Mom entered an Alzheimer’s residence in 1995, I received two cardboard boxes of mementos. Her husband had found the musty crushed cartons in the basement when cleaning out Mom’s possessions. Since Mom no longer recognized what she […]

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Long Distance Love

“Why?” I moaned. “You’ve been gone over a month. The kids and I miss you. I’m lonely.” “E, I’m sorry,” Vic said from somewhere in Israel where he was doing research. “I’ll only be away a few days […]

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A Painting, a Pyramid, and my Longing

“I brought you a gift,” my daughter-in-law Liz said the day after the launch party for Leaning into Love. She seemed unusually shy. “Really, Liz? Another gift? You gave me the gift of driving from North Carolina to […]

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A Book Launch, an Engagement, and a Pyramid

My family enjoys extravaganzas. It was my husband Vic’s style. If you can’t celebrate in a big way, why bother? I remember my surprise birthday party staged by Vic in 1968. Friends walked down the hill toward our Cayuga […]

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My Lover’s Secret

“What did you do before you came to Cornell?” I asked. We sat on his couch, drank red wine, and listened to Buffy St. Marie on the stereo. He was sturdy and muscular with dark curls. My heart had […]

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